Pub Prayer
As promised, the prayer for pisspots. I first heard the mockery in Tom Holloway’s grim drama, Don’t Say The Words, and wasn’t sure if the parody was original.
Turns out a jokey T-shirt company, and 500 other places around the net, carry the spoof. Minor variations exist around the traps but Tom nails the best draft in Scene III. As a lapsed Christian with a soft spot for hops, I couldn’t resist enshrining the scripture:
Our lager,
Which art in barrels,
Hallowed be thy drink,
Thy will be drunk,
(I will be drunk)
At home as I am in tavern.
Give us this day our foamy head,
And forgive us our spillages,
As we forgive those who spill against us,
And lead us not to incarceration,
But deliver us from hangovers,
For thine is the beer,
The bitter and the lager,
Forever and ever,
Barmen.